UPCAT Results Online – University of the Philippines

UPCAT Results Online – University of the Philippines.

Viewing headless bodies causes face adaptation : Neurophilosophy

Viewing headless bodies causes face adaptation : Neurophilosophy.

Untitled

I was suppose to post this before 2009 ends as a sort of year-end post, but I can’t resist taking pictures of some of the fireworks around here.

I went up to our balcony at around 23:32, positioned by tripod and digicam, and started hunting for the best fireworks. It turns out I forgot to charge the freaking camera, and I only had 30 minutes to take shots. Furthermore, several wires were blocking the view. What’s worse, it seems no one near us used those expensive, beautiful-to-look-at fireworks.

Thankfully I was able to take decent shots. Well, these are shots that I can manage, given my equipment and situation.

Come to think of it, life is like hunting the best fireworks shot/s. Whether it’s romance, happiness, or success, it’s as elusive and as beautiful as witnessing fireworks. You are constrained by internal and external factors. And even if these beautiful fireworks present themselves in your front, sometimes you have to choose among them, because you only have one camera lens to focus on these fireworks. It’s 40% searching, 40% luck, and 20% persistence.

I’m too sleepy to be babbling about life and fireworks. Both are beautiful to behold. Both are evanescent. The very thing that makes us appreciate both things is that they’re both magnificent and temporary. Only their memories and shadows will remain with us.

This post is untitled, so to speak. Life is a work-in-progress. Nothing’s destined. 2010 is a blank whiteboard. It’s up to you what would your life’s title be.

Anyway, good night and good morning.

Two.

“You went up on the stage to observe them dancing and jumping in sync with the wild music. She suddenly walks towards you and tries to drag you into the middle of the crowd to dance with her. Of course you declined. In your life you were never known as a party animal, let alone a party dancer. You notice the disappointment at her face but you can’t bring yourself to accompany her. She walks away somewhat angry and sad.

You went back to the sound system room, your mind gnawing you not only because you disappointed her, but you lied to yourself and said that you didn’t want to dance with her. And yet…

You suddenly stood up, went out of your refuge, walked towards her, lifts her hand as quickly and as gently as possible, and went into the middle of the crowd to dance. It was only then that you realized that what was playing was slow music. You panicked, this is an awkward moment, you tell yourself. You fumbled on how will you carry this out. You told her, as casually as possible, that you don’t know what to do, yet your voice sounded nervously. She grabs your hand and puts it on her hips, while you two dance, or rather, moved left and right in synchronized motion. You felt so awkward, the first time in your life, that you can’t bring yourself to look at her eyes and gaze upon her face. You can see the other students taking a picture of you. You tried to laugh at your predicament, but you noticed that she seems dissatisfied. You don’t know what to do. As your mind raced thinking of a way to at least make her smile tonight, the song ends.

You both separated from each other without any single word. She goes back to her group of friends while you went out of the venue.

You sat near the gate. Stupid, stupid, stupid, you tell yourself. Stupid. You’ll remember this event as one of those things that you’ll change should you be given an opportunity to turn back time. You can still feel the numerous eyes staring at you. But you’re also happy. For a moment you wished that somehow, somehow, your dance with her would never end.”

On Goodbyes and Good Nights

Last Night, Good Night

Sung by Miku Hatsune

Lyrics (taken from http://tsukiokuhime.wordpress.com/2008/08/14/last-night-good-night/ )

Suya suya yume o miteru kimi no yokogao
I’m watching you as you sleep peacefully
kizuwazu koboreta namida hoho o tsutau
I don’t realize the streaming tears that wets my cheeks

Setsuna no tokimeki o kono mune ni kakushiteta no
I’m hiding these painful heartbeats within my heart

Last Night, Good Night
Last Night, Good Night
Last Night, Good Night
Last Night, Good Night
Kono yoru kimi no te nigitte nemuru yo
I fall asleep tonight while holding your hand tightly
“Oyasumi.”
“Good Night.”

Suteki na asa o mou ichido kimi to sugosetara
If only I could spend another wonderful morning with you
Chiisana sonna kibou sae, omou dake o kiseki
Even if my hope is nothing but that, I think even if all I can do is think about it it’s still a miracle

Nani o tsutaenai mama “Sayonara” o ienai yo

How could I say “Good Bye” before telling you anything about what I feel?

Last Night, Good Night
Last Night, Good Night
Last Night, Good Night
Last Night, Good Night

Kono koe karetemo kienai MELODY
Even if my voice will fade someday, this melody will surely last

Last Night, Good Night
Last Night, Good Night
Last Night, Good Night
Itsuka wa mukaeru saigo o omou yo
When I think about the end that we will have to face someday
Yozora ni negaou tokiwa no egao o
I cast my wish to this night sky that your smile will last forever
“Oyasumi.”
“Good Night.”

P.S. Thanks Rystraum for introducing me to this wonderful song.

One.

“You’ve been spending time on Facebook for 7 hours straight now. You haven’t done anything productive this weekend, aside from the fact that you were able to finish two books, which, although useful, doesn’t do anything to accelerate the completion of your tasks.

As you type these words and re-read them carefully you hear again the words of your so-called acquaintances trying to tell you that your current job is shit and kept saying “would you like to try this opportunity blah blah you will earn your 4 months worth of salary in just a month, or even less,” and you have this urge to answer them back saying “Why? what’s wrong with my current salary? Do you want me to turn into someone like you, who lost his sense of humanity in exchange for pieces of paper but hating his job?”

And, in your typical fashion of criticizing every thought your mind generates, you say to yourself, “Am I really comfortable with my current job or am I rationalizing?”

You process thoughts like you always do, like opening several tabs of Firefox (just like now). You’re thinking of several thoughts right now, work, blog, lessons, her, firefox, multi-threaded thinking… the list goes on as you search your mind.

You recently acquired a notebook worth Php170.00 courtesy of her eminence Zafra, and started keeping a diary/idea pad, which inspired you to renew your resolve to blog. Not contented with that, you started writing a pseudo-story and plans to assign numbers as titles of chapters, with changing the language to vary it a bit.

Your mind then suddenly shifts its attention to her. Or more specifically, to them. You automatically feel a sort of guilt of liking more than one female, but then you also remember the fact that that is a social convention and is natural, which doesn’t make it morally right but makes it feel less guilty. Her face pops in your mind, her face smiling at you against a dark background, and you’re wondering what’s the reason why you thought of her, then you remember you thought about her when you wrote the word ‘her’ in the ‘multi-threaded’ part of your pseudo-story.

You suddenly remember Berkley and Kant, and then Sophie’s World. You remember the books that you’ve been reading these past few days, and then you remember that you’ve been digressing. But there is no purpose for this thing that you’re blogging. You can almost call it freewriting, you say to yourself. And yet you cannot call it that simply because you’re still guided by the fact that you’re trying to write a pseudo-story about you, or rather, your thinking process, as it turned out. But if you’re writing about your thinking process, then you’re undergoing a thinking process about writing about your thinking process. You ask yourself, how are people able to observe themselves from a third person point of view? What particular parts of the brain are responsible for such feats?

As you continually mull over these things, you notice that you haven’t been talking about relationships and love and crushes now. You say to yourself that you have different priorities now, and you quickly ask yourself if that statement really reflects the truth or are you just escaping? We can never know the truth, you say to yourself, we can only try to pursue them.

You don’t know what the heck that means to your current situation. You decided to end this nonsense and continue some other time. Will this pseudo-story befitting of a title? What the heck, you say to yourself, things like this will generate themselves. And with a sarcastic smile on your face you triumphantly press the comma, and ends this sentence with a double-quote.”

Call me a hypocrite…

But I don’t feel like working for money alone.

I’ve been asked a lot about my choice of occupation. As you all know, I’ve been hired as an educator by my former high school (if you don’t know that, please read my other posts (haha, shameless plugging)). Some were just curious, some were shocked. I completely understood their reactions since even I didn’t have any inkling of pursuing this profession back when I was in high school and college. However, there’s this bunch of acquaintances who thought I might be better off with some famous corporate office where I could earn in just a month my 4 months worth of salary.

In a typical me-as-the-compromise-give-you-the-benefit-of-a-doubt-wants-peace-guy fashion I just give them my typical answer, that office work in my opinion, would only dull my academe side and that teaching will enable me to continually study and learn as a preparation for my Masters.

As I can see from their eyes these are the particular type of people who measure success by measuring the amount of your earnings per year. These are the people who look down on the profession of teaching as something not significant.

Call me a hypocrite, but I can’t bring myself to like/dislike a job solely based on the number of digits in my payslip. I do believe that money is important. That lot of money is good, since it enables you to be financially secure. In truth I want Php 21 million pesos for me to invest in a bank, and live on the interest it generates, so that I’ll stop working altogether and focus on things that I really wanted to do. But to work solely for money is definitely not for me.

Of course, there are some whose situation demands that he/she do things that he/she didn’t like but needs to because the job is high-paying. I’m not condemning them. But please do not measure one’s success based on the number of their salary’s digits.