Ash-like Snow

Yay! The 2nd quarterly exams were finally over, here comes the checking and updating of individual student grades. List of things to be done this month:

• Record and update grades
• Establish the journalism club
• Plan the entire quarter’s lesson for thesis and literature
• Finalize installation and tweaking of Koha for the Library Automation
• Upgrade laptop
• Open a Bank Account

And many many more that I can’t remember xD

Meanwhile, I am moving forward with my life. I find it surprising that I enjoy teaching. Might stay in this job for at least another year. More or less, I’ll have to leave this field after 3-4 years. Might as well enjoy the moment haha.

For the meantime, my interest in anime has been revived, thanks to Code Geass.

Life update

Haven’t updated this blog for awhile, partly because of being too busy, partly because i had nothing to write/expound/rant on. Which is not to say that I have something relevant to write now. Just felt updating. After all, it’s not like my readers will be missing anything.

Anyway, living a single life has its ups and downs. It’s fun since now I have all the time to do the things that I want. It’s sad because sometimes I ask myself if what I’m doing is what I really need?

Everything for me starts by asking questions. Introspective interrogation has been my friend since God knows when. There is a question though if what I’m doing is really introspection/discovering myself or just rationalizations.

Spewing out random thoughts typing on my laptop while lying on my bed. Feels lazy these past few days. I do know it’s not depression, having experienced that ordeal 2 years ago. It’s not stress, methinks. I just need sleep. But that reasoning can also be a rationalization.

In a way, this is still freewriting, though not as random as my other freewritings. But now you can see that I’m still not inspired to write anything. Which reminds me. I discovered this particular research manual written by one of the former teachers of the school where I teach. I’m thinking of rewriting this one.

Oh well. Meanwhile, I can’t stop listening to Yiruma’s tunes, since they resemble my improvisations a bit. I just wish they re-tune the piano back.

That’s it. Boring post. Boring life.

adobosoda is now online

adobosoda.biz.nf is now online.

In medias res

You are assuming that you’re alone in your room and you’re right about it, that you are alone and yet you can’t get this feeling that you aren’t so you tried to pass some time by doing some freewriting in your blog oh what the heck you named your post in medias res now it was supposedly taken from one of your discussions in your class why would you use it may be it’s because you are in the middle of freaking things, this is not the end, and you are past the start, you are drowning yourself to all this work believing that you won’t feel that pain when you’re busy or tired but you can’t control yourself and still managed to call her up and yet you are a stubborn fool and aside from that you don’t know what you’re doing hmmm maybe doing this everyday might exorcise those thoughts that’s haunting you and this is a very good exercise on warming you up in writing it is late why won’t you sleep is it because of thinking that you still need to do something oh what the heck you can’t stop writing and is now talking to yourself you imagine yourself in the future and you still think that you don’t want teaching HS to be your ultimate career in life you’re still dreaming of becoming something big but you yourself doesn’t know what you really want and so you rely on your own intuition trusting it that it will take you down to the right path and you sort of think of it that way but what if you are just rationalizing your wrong decisions and it still no enough for own self to tell you that then fine write here write write write and then don’t stop just keep on writing and think about all the things that makes you sad happy angry etc all emotions mixed up into one chaotic wall of text you haven’t done this for a year you owe yourself into warming up you are here all alone typing in your laptop and is suppose to be doing something important but you postpone until it’s too late you are an idiot people whom you don’t know has a lot to tell about you being intelligent smart etc but does those things count do those make you happy what do you really want to do?

The day of introductions

Wooh! First day. Met with the seniors, juniors, and the 4th grade, and although 4th graders were such a pain in the ass, it was mostly a fun day. Ah yes, the time for revenge has come.

Kidding aside, here I am right now, reading several books that might be pertinent to my class lectures tomorrow. I have certain perceptions on certain classes but I am ignoring so as not to lose my objectivity regarding the matter.

Anyway I can’t spend much time blogging, just bumped an update here.

Jumpstart

It’s been months since I updated this blog, frustrating my avid readers in the process (last time I checked, I got two of  them). I told myself that I won’t blog until I found a job, though laziness is the more likely reason for my inactivity.

Anyway. The fact that I posted something new today means I already have a job. Last week my high school alma mater offered me to teach research to their senior students, and consequently, english literature as well to the other years. Complications and issues later, it’s final: I am going to teach 4th grade science and Junior and Senior english literature.

Sounds fun.

Except for the fact that I haven’t got experience in teaching literature, let alone english literature. I am required to teach in english, something my younger self would be horrified to know. Well yeah, I know my subject-verb agreement, and perhaps written dozens of research papers, but speaking english has never been my proverbial cup of tea. I am tempted to blame The University, or even the environment where I was raised. But it wouldn’t change my circumstances. The only solution for now it seems is to accept the fact that shit happens. I’ll just have to deal with it.

On the positive light, accepting this job may mean that I’ll continue to study for the rest of the year, which is a very good way IMO in preparing myself for the research work for the Master’s.

Oh well, I’ll start tomorrow. Let’s hope things will be less horrendous than what I expect it to be.

So a chapter ends. And a new one begins.

New Life.

New Theme.

New Priorities.

“We live immersed in narrative, recounting and reassessing the meaning of our past actions, anticipating the outcome of our future projects, situating ourselves at the intersection of several stories not yet completed.”

Indeed.